Friday, June 6, 2014

Rambling of a Normal Guy: Student vs Professor, Evolution vs Creationism, Make believe vs reality.

Cthulhu doesn't give two shits about Evolution or Creationism...

Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk. 

For the purpose of this blog little c christian refers to "fake look at me cry" religious people. Christian with a big C refers to people who actually follow Christ.  

As anyone who have ever written a blog, drafted newspapers or envisioned novels can tell you, the Muse can be a cruel mistress sometimes. One moment she is with you, dancing with ideas and words, the next she is leaving you cold and alone. Stories, so many and faster than fingers could type, are now replaced with nothing but barren fields, devoid of all life. How can I update this blog, how can I keep it current if nothing comes to me? What shall happen if I never hear the good song of the Muse again? I know the source true, but what good does it do me? When Fred Phelps was excommunicated from the WBC and then finally passed away, the WBC really just doesn't matter anymore. Oh sure, they will try to attention whore still, but honestly, their time has come and pass, it's as if they have all passed away. The source of my ramblings was gone, and so was any ambition to write. But thankfully, I think the spell might have finally been lifted, if only for a time.

And it's all thanks to Facebook.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Rambling of a Normal Guy: No shirt, no shoes, no homosexuals?

Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk. 

For the purpose of this blog little c christian refers to "fake look at me cry" religious people. Christian with a big C refers to people who actually follow Christ. 



With constant reminders of how we are in the modern age, how we are so advanced and enlightened, how I live in richest, most powerful and most free nation in the world, I'm getting really fucking sick and tired of stories like this. How can we call ourselves the land of the free when we actively seek to deny human rights to humans? You can't say its "religious rights" when you deny rights to another, even more so when they are the same rights you would raise a bitch fest over. To make a long story short, recently the Kansas House overwhelmingly passed a bill that would allow people and businesses to refuse service based on sexual orientation or marital status if doing so would be contrary to the “sincerely held religious beliefs of the individual. "Religious beliefs" wasn't clarified by the article or by the state Rep, but considering the track record, one can safely assume it means his version of what he calls christian beliefs. Also while I find the whole law insulting on a purely human level, what really stuck out with me was this;

State Rep. Charles Macheers drafted the proposed legislation and argued it would prevent “hurtful” discrimination, claiming the bill would give business owners their right to religious freedom.
“There have been times throughout history where people have been persecuted for their religious beliefs because they were unpopular,” Macheers said. “This bill provides a shield of protection for that.”


Monday, January 13, 2014

Rambling of a Normal Guy: ... and you are crying why?


Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk. 

You've been warned by the way, there will be lots of cursing or/and offensive comments. 


I hope you will pardon me if I open this post with a "back in my day" moment. You see, I was born around the same time as the modern internet. That would be AOL 1.0 kids. Having grown up with the internet, I'm no stranger to the activities and questionable things people do there. But as I grow older, I grow more and more concerned by a pattern I am seeing. I watch the younger generation become addicted to twitter, myspace, facebook and more. They put their personal lives on full display then complain when people comment on it. I would think if you want something kept private, you wouldn't put it on a public forum. Same with being left alone. If "something really bad happened, but I don't want to talk about it", then keep it to yourself, not Facebook. It gets even worse when it comes to opinions. To many of the younger (and even older) generations, they are starting to think opinions are the same as fact. They will make a statement, then expect everyone to agree with it, then cry is someone dare speaks against it. With this type of disturbing attitude allowed to fester and grow, they become one of the worse things this world can produce... the attention whore. The attention whore is a pervasive pattern of excessive emotionality and attention seeking, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:


  • Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention. Will produce videos or make up drama in order to get said attention back. 
  • Interaction with others is often characterized by "hey look at me, me me me me me". Any deviation away from them will result in child like tantrums.  
  • Will often try to downplay or belittle others then cry, complain and act hurt when their plans do not net them more attention.  
  • Will often expect others to do as they want (all the time) because they are the center.
  • Displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions. Will often use said emotions to play overdone or made up drama for even more attention. 
  • Will use physical appearance, attitude, ideology or some form of "religion"  to draw attention to self.
  • Has a style of speech that is excessively impressionistic and lacking in detail. Otherwise known as "Talking a lot but saying nothing."
  • Shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion. Will also use other legitimate misfortune or situation to draw attention to themselves. 
  • Is suggestible and will often join any social/political/religious group that gives them attention.  
  • Considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are.
  • Will use "selective memory" or completely rewrite the past in order to make themselves appear more than they are. 
If you ever worked in customer service, or spent five minutes on Facebook, you know exactly what I am talking about. The one who always posts about "being so fat" but weighs 100lbs soaking wet? The one who overreacts over the simplest things? The one who thinks they can tell others what they can and can not do based on weight ("you can't cos-play, you're fat")? The "this post is about me (when it's not), I'm mad now"? All are examples of such.  So what does this have to do with today's post? Because today, we have a "religious" douchbag who thought it was a great idea to attention whore... then complained about it.

Monday, September 9, 2013

Rambling of a Normal Guy: You know what they say about Opinions....


Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column, where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk. 

So if you've been reading my blog for a while, you probably figured out two things about me. The first, is that I do not write often because of time, work and all around laziness. The second is that when I do write, it is because of something that is very important to me. So why I am writing today, right smack in the middle of programming my own game? Well you see, while I was on Facebook looking over various post of cats, cats, and more cats (did I mention cats?), I found a random post by a friend. It was a picture of a news article about a woman speaking about the evils of "the gays". True, we have freedom of speech in the US, so she is welcome to say what ever she wants. But while everyone is entitled to their opinion, everyone is also entitled to respond.. especially when they are being a whiny bitch. The image below is the article in question, I highly recommend reading it first... despite that nature of the article.

Monday, July 15, 2013

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Really Fox? Really? AGAIN!


Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if, you know as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. At best, many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. At worse, they believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or the Christian devil. With this miniblog series, it is my hope to not only document my time growing as a Pagan, but to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.

Special thanks to Jennifer Arend for giving me the heads up. Stay strong and awesome sister! 

Back in my day, which is surprisingly not that long ago, journalism meant something. It was a group of people and organizations that worked hard to seek out the truth of a story and report on it. Opinions where kept to talk shows, and fast (actual facts) where presented with out political influence. Sites like policofacts really wasn't needed because reporters where ready to fact check the hell out of everything. But now a days? Not so much. Now a days, we have idiots on NBC (or what ever BC it was) making the absolutely rubbish claims that Normans where nothing more than sex crazed prostitutes. Seriously man, you're not Bill O'reilly, stick to reporting on facts, and facts that can actually be backed up.  (Protip: We know where the moon and waves come from)

So what's the point of today's post? Well, it seems our darling Fox News is up to some silly crap again. Meet me past the break to share my surprise.


Thursday, May 16, 2013

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Stupid Cliches We Use (2)



Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if, you know as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. At best, many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. At worse, they believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or the Christian devil. With this miniblog series, it is my hope to not only document my time growing as a Pagan, but to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.


When I first came up with the idea of this blog, and even this series, a few things quickly came to light. The first, which I'm sure you can guess, is my utter lack of proper spelling and grammar.  Hey this is Amerikca, I can does what I want! Coming in a very close second place, was the realization this would take up a lot of time creating. I can't tell you how many times I had to write, rewrite, disregard and start anew something just because I hated even just a single word or phrase. Even now, I want to stop writing this installment to completely rewrite everything on my blog. Thanks scumbag brain!


As I pressed on, continuing to write about this or that experience, working past personal inadequacy and such, something completely unexpected happened. Just days after posting my first issue, I started receiving emails about my ramblings. This in itself wasn’t all unexpected; in fact you might even say I was awaiting "you're stupid die" emails. So, unsurprisingly, I ignored my email box, unable to bring myself to even look at it. Working in customer service, and having to deal with joyful customers on a daily basis, you can imagine the things I conjured up with. But you know what? My curiosity got the better of me. It's like saying "don't press the big red button"! As I read over them, one by one, I got a feeling I never thought I would get. Email after email was filled with words of encouragement, of stories relating to my own, and of thanks for doing what I did.

How awesome sauce is that?

Monday, February 18, 2013

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Really Fox? Really?

Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if, you know as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. At best, many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. At worse, they believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or the Christian devil. With this miniblog series, it is my hope to not only document my time growing as a Pagan, but to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.
 

Keeping touch with various liberal and progressive groups on facebook, as well as there respected news sites, I get a lot of stories that make my head hurt. In fact, it's getting to the point where I just want to stop following everything all together. I'm sick of the political undertones, of the opinions being regarded as facts, and anyone with a over sized mouth is automatically right. But until the day when I finally throw up my hands and say to hell with it all, I must press on. After all, being a good red blooded Irish American I can always fancy myself a drink, a love of life, red heads and a good fight.

So we press on. 

When the muse hits me and I write my ramblings for what ever reason, I try to be direct and least insulting as possible, especially when it comes to religion. While having a go with the "elect" members of the WBC, I must know and remember they do not represent all of the followers of Christ. Just like pedophiles, "holy" murders and so on. The moment I forget myself and this, I become no better than them. Do I slip up from time to time? Sure I am only human after all, and to claim perfection on my part would just be stupid. But like I said, I know who the good ones are, who the bads ones are, and never willingly apply the few to the whole.

But you know what really pisses me off? Like "Omg I just my hot topic membership card, I am so Wiccan now." piss me off? When we have grown adults, who are responsible and portray "fair and balanced" aura on national TV, resemble nothing more than a pack of immature children in order to obtain ratings and attention. Honestly if all you are after is cash, then please refrain from calling yourself fair and balanced reporters of the news. But what the hell am I talking about? On February 15th, Fox and Friends aired what contained one the biggest demonstration of ignorance I have seen this year. Not only do the openly mock another faith, my faith, while whining about being persecuted, they do with mirth seen at good times with friends. How professional of them...

The whole thing was so horribly wrong and painful to watch, that I'm not even sure I'll get to it all in this posting... but I shall try me best.


Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Ramblings of a Normal Guy: A Rambling for Gay Marriage Part 2!


Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk.

WARNING: There might be some disturbing images in this rambling of people that where beaten and abused. This is the world we live in, and a world which such utter bullshit happens. I ask you not to look away, but if you must just be warned. Also as a note, this was suppose to be just a part two, but because of the length and amount of ranting, I had to move this to a three part project.

And so... here we are again.

When I was first considering writing the previous rambling for equal rights and equal marriage, it took a considerable amount of time to get from start to finish. Formulating the how and why took far more time than I first anticipated, my bad thinking it would be a quick fix. Eventually it took a mental push in the form of being forced asked to write this, to finally get the ball rolling and the paper finished. As I began to write, and the paragraphs started forming, I knew this wasn't going to be pretty. When one challenges a long held religious beliefs, especially when they are considered so central to ones faith, one must go about it slowly, logically and with care. If one does not, the entire thing will turn into nothing more than a bitch fest. After all, saying "You're stupid" doesn't even work for kids anymore... So then, when the job was finally completed, five big points where addressed that opponents like to use to justify their mistrust/hate/oppression with equal rights. When I hit the publish button I knew it wouldn't take long to get interesting emails. Oh boy where they fun too. But all in all, I was pretty much done with the subject. I was also content to have just one issue of it because, if you allow me a moment of pride, I thought one was enough. Anything more would just be an annoying circle jerk and saying the same bloody thing over and over and over again.


Then I had the unfortunate pleasure of being refereed to NOM's recent video.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Stupid Cliches we use



Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if, you know as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. At best, many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. At worse, they believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or the Christian devil. With this miniblog series, it is my hope to not only document my time growing as a Pagan, but to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.

When I somehow manage to get myself out of bed, which usually involves an unnecessary amount of screaming and cursing, I liked to start my day out with a little ritual. I enjoy some lemon aid, more toast than anyone should eat, and a nice helping of thinkprogress for my news. While every news program, website and blog has a agenda and bias of some sort, I find that thinkprogress at least makes it tolerable for a bit. While I was scanning the numerous stories of how Mitt Rommy managed to screw yet another thing up, and even more numerous comments on it, I found a random link to "10 Cliches Christian's should never use". Written and later expanded upon by Christian Piatt, it gave some interesting insight to how some "religious" sayings can just be mean, or down right insulting. From the first paragraph I knew it was going to be good;

"We Christians have a remarkable talent for sticking our feet in our mouths. When searching the words most commonly associated with “Christian,” the list ain’t pretty. I think part of this can be attributed to a handful of phrases that, if stricken from our vocabulary, might make us a little more tolerable. Yes, these things may mean something to you, but trust me, non-Christians don’t share your love for these tried-and-true cliches."
If you are interested here is part one and part two.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Religious Nuts Exposed: Predictions about Obama


The Westboro Baptist Church (or WBC) is an Independent Baptist “church” known for its extreme stance against homosexuality, other religions, and anything else that tickles their fancy. They are also known for their greatly offensive protest activities against fallen service men/woman and high profile aka popular people. In this special section created for the WBC Cult Exposed we will explore their hateful and distorted “divine” teachings and expose them for what they truly are, a hate group who uses religion for personal power. 

By the Earth Mother, how long has it been since I last sat down and wrote one of these? Must have been at least a couple of months, at the very least. Maybe it's been work that has been keeping me away? Work has been killer with the amount of hours I needed to put into it, many of them off the clock. This or that has been breaking down will this person or that has been causing more problems then good. Maybe it's been my personal life; no never mind I don't have one. Maybe it's just that the WBC really hasn't done anything worth writing about? Sure they still protest funeral and blow more hot air than a balloon, but what's new? They have been doing the same tired crap now for years and it's getting easier and easier to tune out. The WBC just isn't that important anymore. However this coming week changed everything, what is it you wonder? Was it some photoshopped protest? Saying the 1st amendment had holes in it... in Canada? Claiming to be in the UK when they are banned from the country? No, it's something even better!



ITS THE END OF THE WORLD!
I for one, welcome our furry overlords...
They warned us you know, they really did...
 

Friday, May 25, 2012

How WBC Fails: The complete collection Vol 1


The Westboro Baptist Church (or WBC) is an Independent Baptist “church” known for its extreme stance against homosexuality, other religions, and anything else that tickles their fancy. They are also known for their greatly offensive protest activities against fallen service men/woman and high profile aka popular people. In this special section created for the WBC Cult Exposed we will explore their hateful and distorted “divine” teachings and expose them for what they truly are, a hate group who uses religion for personal power.



Blogging: 

Not to long ago, this little blogger issued a contest of shorts to the folks of the Westboro Baptist Church. If you are blissfully unaware of what these things… er people are, then you are one lucky person
While spending my off hours trolling the WBC (can it be considered trolling?), the email for the cult was posted on their twitter account. AWESOME! I thought, I could pose my Q&A again without the need to shorten it. Well I got an email back, and not surprisingly it's something I would expect from a second grader.
I was once asked why I even bother with the crazies, and here is why. 
Who knew? The most hated family in America also fails at blogging. SHOCKING! 
 Interviews and Tv Spots:
Nathan "Nate" Phelps (born November 1958) is an author, speaker on religion and child abuse, and an LGBT advocate.  The seventh child of Pastor Fred Phelps, Phelps has been estranged from the majority of his family since his 18th birthday. Phelps has since declared himself an atheist. He is known for his open criticism of the Westboro Baptist Church through literature, interviews, public speaking at atheist conventions and his website. He states that his father abused him and the other Phelps children and believes that the church is an organization for his father to "vent his rage and anger." Today I am now happy to present part one of the email Q&A I had with Nate Phelps, otherwise known as the No H8 Phelps.  
Our words are also not free floating, easily said then quickly forgotten. Our words can linger on in people and thought, or even echo forever in the ages. Like what is said about the internet, once you say something it is more than likely recorded somewhere. Today’s edition deals with language in a much different way than the previous “God H8’s” series. In such previous titles we explored how their main message of each video was hateful and… well crap. In today’s edition I want to return to their previous video and twitter postings to explore the items we might have missed. You know, the little things they let slip that gives hint to just how deep the rabbit hole goes.  
Shirley, along with other female members of her "church", preached about a Jewish video that taught America's how to murder the WBC. While many, myself included, would call their religious and political views extreme, making a movie for the purposes of "Idiot's Guide to killing WBC"... is a bit much. I was also curious that it was Jewish in nature. You would think a people who have suffered A LOT would turn their nose to such actions. The video in question is the trailer for a new fictional movie is called  God Bless America (2012).  A how to guide for killing the WBC? Wut?!?



Videos - God H8's series

  1. People should be accepted for who they are.
  2. He who is without sin, cast the first stone.
  3. Eating Shellfish is the same sin as being a fag.
  4. Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you.
  5. God gave man free will.
  6. God does not hate.
  7. God loves everybody.
  8. Hell's not a real place, it’s a state of mind
  9. I’ll Pray for you
  10. The Bible is subject to interpretation
  11. Jews didn't kill Jesus - He was a Jew
  12. For God so loved the world
  13. Judge Not That Ye Be Not Judged
  14. God don't make no junk
  15. Love Thy Neighbor As Thyself
  16. God loves the sinner, hates the sin
  17. God doesn’t cause bad things to happen to people.
  18. That's Only Old Testament Stuff
  19. Accept Jesus as your personal savior


 

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Growing Pains



Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People also have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. To many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. They also believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or even worse the Christian devil. With this mini-set it is my hope to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people too. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.

Before we begin, let’s be 100% honest with ourselves; growing up can be a real - well I let you choose your descriptive word there...

Forcefully being removed from a blissful world of near perfect entertainment with friends, caring for nothing and using your parents money like candy is not a super awesome thing. Being forcefully injected into a world of cold hard and unforgiving reality is not something anyone embraces either. But that's life, as they say. Traversing the sands of time towards the march of adulthood, our childhood joys are replaced with worries about puberty, voice cracking, social awkwardness, jobs, pay checks, taxes, bills, dating, Facebook and so much more. When you throw in our “glorious” technological age where every embarrassing moment can be recorded and put on YouTube in under ten seconds, one wonders how teens don’t suffer more mental break downs.

So yea, life just sucks sometimes....

When last we gathered, I wrote about how Christianity just wasn’t working for me, even at a young age. Even then I had to many question, to many thoughts that didn't add up, and to many “you will understand when you are older” comments in response. 

Having survived the test of time, and being far older now than I was then, I really find such comments insulting. Hey how about instead of dodging the question, you actually come up with some answers? This is your faith after all, isn't? How can a baby be born evil? There is no sin there, that child is the closest thing to purity humanity we will ever see. If God is sovereign and controls everything, what right does he have to punish people doing his will (be it good or bad)? If Christ was all about peace, love, helping EVERYONE, why do so many of his followers scoff at doing such?

Like I said, to many questions, zero acceptable answers.

So after much soul searching, research, and help from actual supportive people, I am now part of the Pagan fold. But what does any of this blabbering (I know I do tend to ramble on) have to do with today’s Rambling of a pagan guy? As we already know from personal experience, growing up today is not a easy thing to do. When anyone grows up willingly embracing a religion many considering "Satanic", well that just makes a bad trip worse. Today's rambling is part of the on going thing to record my experiences as a teen and young adult, and part message to the younger generation of Pagans out there. We "old heads" know what you are going threw, and we know the constant pain and mental abuse you experience at the hands of ignorance.

You are not alone.


Saturday, March 24, 2012

Ramblings of a Normal Guy: How cults work

Your cult will never be as cool as Cthulhu. Or cats.

Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk. 

Today's posting actually came about from a Q&A session on twitter. The person in question had a lot of questions about cults. So good in fact, that I thought it would be a good idea to make a blog post about them.


Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Answering the call



Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People also have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. To many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. They also believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or even worse the Christian devil. With this mini-set it is my hope to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people too. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.


For Christmas this year, both my brother and I found "family tree" style decorations for mom. The past year she has really been getting into this whole genealogy thing, we both figured it was a quick and painless way to make her happy.*1 Not to mention be seen as actual caring sons!

On my brother's side, he found a very nice metal tree where the ends doubled as picture holders. It's currently hanging in the "dinnering room" if you want to call it that. For me, I found this wall design thing that can be worked and designed in any way you please. The leaves (at least that's what I think they are) also double as picture frames and can be placed where you please. It is pretty neat, and a lot bigger than the link imply. Typical of the mom attitude, she was ever so pleased with what her boys did for her. And yes, moms are the only ones allowed to over embellish things! After the normal family parties and merry wishing, Mom spent the next three months finding just the right places for her trees  and just the right photos for it. As you might have also guessed, the first photos to come out where the baby photos. A never ending supply of pictures from my birth, baptism, first steps, first time I escaped the baby play crib, confirmation and so on flowed more easily than any water or beer I've seen.  

Hell I didn't even know it was possible to have this many photos >_>

As the endless process of "yes and no" to this or that photo seemly took years to accomplish, I took notice to some slight tone changes in the way she talked. Where once she wouldn't stop talking about how fracking cute I was as a alter boy, how wonderful and blessed my first communion was, or how adorable I was at my confirmation, that all abundantly ended with the high school years. While she didn't (nor wouldn't) show any type of negativity in her voice, you could still tell there was a slight awkward uneasiness in the air. Confused at first, I suddenly hit me one night while staring at a owl statue (may it burn in hell forever). The reason, which is now clear as day, later became the inspiration for today's rambling of a pagan guy.


Friday, February 17, 2012

Ramblings of a Normal Guy: A Rambling for Gay Marriage


Welcome to another addition of ramblings of a normal guy. This is my special column, where I go off on wild rants complaining about the things that happen and effect my (and ours) every day life. Because of the excessive amounts of stupidity that will be featured, a large amount of inappropriate language will most likely be used. Also expect a large helping of calling out and "I don't give a crap". Rated M for mature, and read at  your own risk.


So before we do this, I need to get a few things straight;

As many of you know by now, I have this growing desire to be pat of and participate in the human rights moment. Why? Because... well it's just not right how humans treat each other. It's deplorable really. The color of one's skin should not dictate social standing, just like who one's love shouldn't get them chained to a car and dragged to death. Seriously, how could anyone thing this is ok to do? How the fuck could anyone think it's ok to kill another because they are gay? All people are equal, all people have the right to life and all people have the right to love. No "god", no bullshit religion, and no book could nor should ever take that away. And no, being gay doesn't lead to bestiality. So it was probably because of this belief, that I was asked to write a essay for gay marriage. Sure, no big there! Yet confident in my choose, a bit of iffyness hits me. It can be best described as doing something you know is right, but also knowing it isn't going to be pretty. As I'm sitting here formulating how I'm going to write this, my brain box races with different ways this will all play out. The purpose of this rambling is to open eyes, not a bitch fest.*1 I happen to know a few people who are very religious, one happens to be a great friend. I want to go about this to show that gay marriage really isn't this horrid thing, not do anything to offend his beliefs. Can I actually do this? 
 
Another point I want to make before I begin in this; when one uses the bible to make arguments about anything of a (non)religious nature, a certain mind set is present. The bible is a two thousand old year old book that many believe is without question or suspect. Within the pages, such people say that nothing is subject to interpretation, nothing is in need of being "updated" to current times and nothing is in need of editing in, out or changed. The bible is a book said to have divine inspiration, and as such should not be held to any mortal law or thought. Each person should and MUST have the right to believe in what they hold true, even if we and others think them batshit insane. While I may find much of Christianity suspect, and the ideas of Creationism just silly, each person that holds true belief in it, must forever be allowed to do so in peace. Religion and faith is their personal relationship in the Divine, not a bloody boxing match! My only problem comes when people use such religion for ego, profit or (in this case) to deny others civil rights. 

Religion is yours to keep, not force on others.

Now that I'm here, and as I further organize my thoughts about this, and I'm just about ready to get started, I come to the realization I will probably offend some people. No matter how one puts it, how nicely it is said or what evidence is presented, there will always be at least one person who takes offense. When one mixes speaking about human rights, taboos and the bible, well let's just say it rarely ends well. As I said before, people have very specific and fixed ideas when it comes to their religious worlds, and when questioned, it is rarely handled civilly. But I seem to be repeat loop here. The purpose of today's Ramblings of a Normal Guy is not to insult or shake ones faith. If you are offended by this, and you are not a egotistical a-hole, I do apologize but ask you to read on. If it shakes your faith in what ever you hold, these are issues you should probably address with yourself.

So yea... here goes.


Thursday, February 2, 2012

Religious Nuts Exposed: God Bless America (2012)



 
Awarded to the Westboro Baptist Church

The Westboro Baptist Church (or WBC) is an Independent Baptist “church” known for its extreme stance against homosexuality, other religions, and anything else that tickles their fancy. They are also known for their greatly offensive protest activities against fallen service men/woman and high profile aka popular people. In this special section, we will explore their hateful and distorted “divine” teachings and expose them for what they truly are, a hate group who uses religion for personal power.


So, I was planning to take a break from How the WBC Fails series to take time to write about other things in my life, most importantly my faith. I really want to take the time and write about the many wonderful things my faith has gifted to me. I want to write about how it opened my eyes and calmed my mind. I want to write about how the God and Goddess has helped me so. While many others may see Paganism as of the devil, we who are actually informed, see our faith, our religion, our heart, as joining with the natural world and coming to terms with ourselves. Yes I know it's a run on sentence, but I really don't care :) For the most part, this is still the case. Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Light and dark is sitting in my draft section ready to be finished. However, I just had to point Firefox over to twitter (and Facebook). As anyone with a desk job can tell you, this is disastrous.  



A how to guide to kill the WBC! Wut?


Sunday, January 29, 2012

Ramblings of a Pagan Guy: Every Journey....



Over the years, I have found that many a person has this strange idea when it comes to the Pagan faiths. It as if as soon as one converts, they [the pagan] are thrown back to the middles ages. People also have this rather quirky notion that pots and pans turn into wands and broomsticks, that tables and chair turning to sacrificial altars and stone circles. To many people think that once one devotes themselves to the God and Goddess, reality bleeds away is magically replaced with Hogwarts schools and Weasly like houses. They also believe that our God and Goddess are just whores, or even worse the Christian devil. With this mini-set it is my hope to address these and many more misunderstood concepts so that we will be see as people too. We are not the demons some people try to make us out to be.

Let's begin by facing the truth. Many young people first come to Wicca (and by extension the Pagan faiths) because they want to feel powerful. They may have seen a movie with three attractive women flinging fireballs like people throw water balloons. They see this and want to be able to do this, they want to do this to people who bully them, who annoy and piss them off. If you work in retail, you hold this as a private fantasy. Then their are the young people (and enlighten adults) who see the various pagan faiths for what they are. They come not for power to control, dominate or harm, but for of self-knowledge, empowerment, and freedom of spirit. They have heard the call of the God and Goddess, they have felt the touch of nature and they want to answer the call. They have seen the need for balance, between good and evil, light and dark, life and death.

When one begins to study they, like myself, often turn to books and the internet (Internet was still a baby back in my day) to find what they seek. By stark contrast of our brothers and sisters of days past, we have a wealth of knowledge right at our finger tips. But even this is both a blessing and a curse. Shorting what is religion, and what is some bullshit becomes harder as "sources" grow. So as I sat here watching the History channel, I came to the conclusion that I wanted to revisit the Ramblings of a Pagan Guy. I wanted to take the time to clean up, remove rubbish and make a meaningful effort to bring words to my faith. But even as I sit here, I find myself aghast as to where to start. It's funny too, I can write for hours about the WBC and their horrid ways, but when it comes to my faith... I hit a wall.  It's all here, the ideas and faith, they all dance in my head and held well in my heart. But how do I bring the proper words to them where they do not sound silly or wrong?


What the frack am I going to do?


Then, while enjoying the wondering creation of Snapple, it hit me. Why do I not start the way I did? By asking questions of my friends who are Pagan and started me on a rather green path? So without further adue, allow me to present the first edition of the new Rambling of a Pagan Guy... and the Q&A I asked of others, and others asked of me. 



About the Faith
 
Witches, Wicca and Pagans. I hear these a lot, are they same?
While a good question, it is often formed in a very rude and condescending way. It's also usually followed with "oh you're just a devil worshiper too!" It's also time's like this I am thankful I am not married yet. I could hear my wife say "Mr Hank, get your ass to bed already and stop answer stupid shit."  When not asked in a jackass way, this is a  fairly common question I get, other than the devil rubbish. When one speaks of the old ways, they understandingly often confuse the terms together assuming that it is all the same. After all, many Witches and Wiccans, do share beliefs in the divine, magic and nature. However there is still a bit of explaining to do.  “Pagan” is an umbrella term that includes many different spiritual polytheist (many Gods) belief systems – in short all witches and Wiccan's are Pagan, but not all Pagans are Wiccans or witches. The Greek, Roman, Sumerian, Egyptian, Wiccan,Witch and many other faiths all fall under this term.

As a side note:
If you are wondering about how Wicca falls into this, Gerald Gardner around the 1950's brought Wicca to the public, and many contemporary Pagans embraced the practice. Although Wicca itself was founded by Gardner, he based it upon the old pagan faiths. So while Wicca may be the old ways reformed and reborn, not all Pagans are Wiccan.


Wait you're a man? I thought all witches (or whatever you call yourself) where women?
When asked what my religion is, I am usually presented by a odd look from at least one person. Assuming they are open minded they then assume that being a Wiccan or Pagan is a woman only thing. As a repetitive of the people who can take a piss standing up, let me tell you this is not the case. While this may open up a can of worms so to speak, I'm still going to say it. People who say only women can be real [pagan sect] are either full of themselves or complete shit. While there are sects that do focus on the feminine divine, the Pagan faiths welcome both men and women with open arms. If we are speaking about Wicca, the faith construct is about balances the polarities... the Goddess and the God, male and female. In the other various Pagan faiths, both men and women serve as equals of faith.

So do Pagan's worship the devil or not?
I will only quickly address this question, because honestly I am sick of hearing it. Satan, or the god of evil, is a religious concept held by only certain monotheist faiths, mostly notably the Christians. Christian's see him as a evil a-hole who wants to ruin everything. Pagans, while having a strong moral structure and firm belief in what is right and wrong, fird the idea that some red skinned, over weight bouncing idiot with a pitch fork focusing us to do wrong is just plain silly. In short, either one of us worship the jerk.


As a side note:

There is also no relation between any of the Pagan faiths and the Church of Satan, which was created by the late Anton LeVey in the 1960s.


Do you people really think Paganism is thousands of years old? Do you honestly think that Wicca is thousands of years old?
Varying in both age and style, ALL the Pagan faiths can claim roots ranging from our old shamanic style cave dwellers to the ancient Sumerians, Egyptians, Greeks and Druids. What roots they claim depends on the traidtion and belief systems. Brought to the public view around the 1950's Gerald B Gardner presented us with the old ways combined and reborn: what we now call Wicca. It is the rebirth of the old ways. A rebooting if you will. Wicca takes it roots from the Druids of Ireland, from the Sumerians and Egyptians, from the wise woman and men from Europe. Hands in many pots type of deal. Many of the main principles are the same, but the structure is different.



Do Pagans have things like church? 
When and if we feel the need to to share and celebrate with others of similar faith and beliefs, we of the Pagan faiths form groupings called Covens. A Coven (or sometimes grove if you're into the celtic path) is a community of pagans who gather together for ceremonies of worship, mutual support or various group rituals. Some examples include Drawing Down the Moon, the blessing and welcoming of a new child into the world or celebrating the Sabbats. Sabbats are our holidays. Wiccan covens are generally jointly led by a High Priestess and a High Priest, though some are led by only one or the other. It really depends on size and who want's to take the responsibility. In other forms of Paganism, covens are sometimes run as democracies with a rotating leadership by both sexes. As for the size and membership of our "churches" no formal number is requested or required, but you will never see anything like a mega church. As a general rule of thumb, you will find frequent mention of the size of thirteen. This is in both reference to the Murray's theories and being a nice round and manageable number. Remember a Coven is suppose to be a personal spiritual center, not a political nightmare.

As a side note:
As already mention, there are many reason why groups will come together to form a coven; one of which is to celebrate our holidays or Sabbats. Our Sabbats are as follows;  *1

Name: Imbolc
Date: Feb. 1st or 2nd
This is a celebration of fertility and designates the middle of winter. Imbolc, (pronounced "IM-bulk" or "EM-bowlk"), also called Oimealg, ("IM-mol'g), by the Druids, is the festival of the lactating sheep. It is derived from the Gaelic word "oimelc" which means "ewes milk". Herd animals have either given birth to the first offspring of the year or their wombs are swollen and the milk of life is flowing into their teats and udders. It is the time of Blessing of the seeds and consecration of agricultural tools. It marks the center point of the dark half of the year. It is the festival of the Maiden, for from this day to March 21st, it is her season to prepare for growth and renewal. Brighid's snake emerges from the womb of the Earth Mother to test the weather, (the origin of Ground Hog Day), and in many places the first Crocus flowers began to spring forth from the frozen earth. The Maiden is honored, as the Bride, on this Sabbat. Straw Brideo'gas (corn dollies) are created from oat or wheat straw and placed in baskets with white flower bedding. Young girls then carry the Brideo'gas door to door, and gifts are bestowed upon the image from each household. Afterwards at the traditional feast, the older women make special acorn wands for the dollies to hold, and in the morning the ashes in the hearth are examined to see if the magic wands left marks as a good omen. Brighid's Crosses are fashioned from wheat stalks and exchanged as symbols of protection and prosperity in the coming year. Home hearth fires are put out and re-lit, and a besom is place by the front door to symbolize sweeping out the old and welcoming the new. Candles are lit and placed in each room of the house to honor the re-birth of the Sun.


Name: Beltane
Date: April 30 or May 1
Many Wiccans and Pagans celebrate Beltane.  It is one of eight solar Sabbats.  This holiday incorporates traditions from the Gaelic Bealtaine, such as the bonfire, but it bears more relation to the Germanic May Day festival, both in its significance (focusing on fertility) and its rituals (such as May pole dancing).  Some traditions celebrate this holiday on May 1 or May day, whiles others begin their celebration the eve before or April 30th. Beltane has long been celebrated with feasts and rituals. The name means fire of Bel; Belinos being one name for the Sun God, whose coronation feast we now celebrate. As summer begins, weather becomes warmer, and the plant world blossoms, an exuberant mood prevails. The May pole was a focal point of the old English village rituals. Many people would rise at the first light of dawn to go outdoors and gather flowers and branches to decorate their homes. Women traditionally would braid flowers into their hair. Men and women alike would decorate their bodies. Beltane marks the return of vitality, of passion. Ancient Pagan traditions say that Beltane marks the emergence of the young God into manhood. Stirred by the energies at work in nature, he desires the Goddess. They fall in love, lie among the grasses and blossoms, and unite. The Goddess becomes pregnant of the God. To celebrate, a wedding feast, for the God and Goddess must be prepared. Breads and cereals are popular. Try oatmeal cakes or cookies sweetened with a dab of honey. Dairy foods are again appropriate...just make a lovely wedding feast and you are sure to enjoy yourself! An early morning walk through a local park or forest could be fun for everyone. Gather up some plants or flowers to display in your home. Mom and daughter could braid their hair, and weave in a few tender blossoms

Name: Lughnasadh
Date: Aug 1
At Lammas, sometimes called Lughnasadh, it's time to celebrate the first harvest of the year, and recognize that the hot summer days will soon come to an end.   The plants of spring wither and drop seeds to ensure future crops. Grains are ready to be harvested and the fruits are ripe for picking.  We can give thanks for the food on our tables. Lughnasadh means the funeral games of Lugh (pronounced Loo), referring to Lugh, the sun god. However, the funeral is not his own, but the funeral games he hosts in honor of his foster-mother Tailte. For that reason, the traditional Tailtean craft fairs and Tailtean marriages (which last for a year and a day) are also celebrated at this time. As autumn begins, the Celtic Sun God enters his old age, but is not yet dead. The God symbolically loses some of his strength as the Sun rises farther in the South each day and the nights grow longer.

Name: Samhain
Date:  Oct 31
Samhain, (pronounced SOW-in, SAH-vin, or SAM-hayne) means "End of Summer", and is the third and final Harvest. The dark winter half of the year commences on this Sabbat. It is generally celebrated on October 31st, but some traditions prefer November 1st. It is one of the two "spirit-nights" each year, the other being Beltane. It is a magical interval when the mundane laws of time and space are temporarily suspended, and the Thin Veil between the worlds is lifted. Communicating with ancestors and departed loved ones is easy at this time, for they journey through this world on their way to the Summerlands. It is a time to study the Dark Mysteries and honor the Dark Mother and the Dark Father, symbolized by the Crone and her aged Consort.

Originally the "Feast of the Dead" was celebrated in Celtic countries by leaving food offerings on altars and doorsteps for the "wandering dead". Today a lot of practitioners still carry out that tradition. Single candles were lit and left in a window to help guide the spirits of ancestors and loved ones home. Extra chairs were set to the table and around the hearth for the unseen guest. Apples were buried along roadsides and paths for spirits who were lost or had no descendants to provide for them. Turnips were hollowed out and carved to look like protective spirits, for this was a night of magic and chaos. The Wee Folke became very active, pulling pranks on unsuspecting humans. Traveling after dark was was not advised. People dressed in white (like ghosts), wore disguises made of straw, or dressed as the opposite gender in order to fool the Nature spirits.

 
Name: Yule
Date: Dec 21(ish) 

Yule, (pronounced EWE-elle) is when the dark half of the year relinquishes to the light half. Starting the next morning at sunrise, the sun climbs just a little higher and stays a little longer in the sky each day. Known as Solstice Night, or the longest night of the year, the sun's "rebirth" was celebrated with much joy. On this night, our ancestors celebrated the rebirth of the Oak King, the Sun King, the Giver of Life that warmed the frozen Earth. From this day forward, the days would become longer. Bonfires were lit in the fields, and crops and trees were "wassailed" with toasts of spiced cider.  Children were escorted from house to house with gifts of clove spiked apples and oranges which were laid in baskets of evergreen boughs and wheat stalks dusted with flour. The apples and oranges represented the sun.  The boughs were symbolic of immortality (evergreens were sacred to the Celts because they did not "die" thereby representing the eternal aspect of the Divine). The wheat stalks portrayed the harvest, and the flour was accomplishment of triumph, light, and life. Holly and ivy not only decorated the outside, but also the inside of homes, in hopes Nature Sprites would come and join the celebration. A sprig of Holly was kept near the door all year long as a constant invitation for good fortune to visit tthe residents. Mistletoe was also hung as decoration.  It represented the seed of the Divine, and at Midwinter, the Druids would travel deep into the forest to harvest it.


Name: Ostara
Date: Mar 21

As Spring reaches its midpoint, night and day stand in perfect balance, with light on the increase. The young Sun God now celebrates a hierogamy (sacred marriage) with the young Maiden Goddess, who conceives. In nine months, she will again become the Great Mother. It is a time of great fertility, new growth, and newborn animals. The next full moon (a time of increased births) is called the Ostara and is sacred to Eostre the Saxon Lunar Goddess of fertility (from whence we get the word estrogen, whose two symbols were the egg and the rabbit.

Name: Litha
Date: June 21st or 22nd
Although the name Litha is not well attested, it may come from Saxon tradition -- the opposite of Yule. On this longest day of the year, light and life are abundant. At mid-summer, the Sun God has reached the moment of his greatest strength. Seated on his greenwood throne, he is also lord of the forests, and his face is seen in church architecture peering from countless foliate masks. Midsummer Night's Eve is also special for adherents of the Faerie faith. The alternative fixed calendar date of June 25 (Old Litha) is sometimes employed by Covens. The name Beltane is sometimes incorrectly assigned to this holiday by some modern traditions of Wicca, even though Beltane is the Gaelic word for May.

Name: Mabon
Date: Sept 21stMabon, (pronounced MAY-bun, MAY-bone, MAH-boon, or MAH-bawn) is the Autumn Equinox. The Autumn Equinox divides the day and night equally, and we all take a moment to pay our respects to the impending dark. We also give thanks to the waning sunlight, as we store our harvest of this year's crops. The Druids call this celebration, Mea'n Fo'mhair, and honor the The Green Man, the God of the Forest, by offering libations to trees. Offerings of ciders, wines, herbs and fertilizer are appropriate at this time. Wiccans celebrate the aging Goddess as she passes from Mother to Crone, and her consort the God as he prepares for death and re-birth. At this festival it is appropriate to wear all of your finery and dine and celebrate in a lavish setting. It is the drawing to and of family as we prepare for the winding down of the year at Samhain. It is a time to finish old business as we ready for a period of rest, relaxation, and reflection.


Is it also true you go to your church naked?

What this is referring to is the practice of Skyclad. Meaning, to be clothed by only the sky, we Pagans see is a return to our natural forms. After all, nudity is considered sacred for it is how we came into the world, and how we where created from the natural act of sex. Despite what others may think, there is nothing wrong with our natural bodies, nor is there anything wrong with liking them. In the use of magic (I'll go into this more later) it is symbolized by being one with nature, and leaving behind the mundane. In addition, it is also believed that clothing restricts the natural flow of energy that is working in us. So by doing away with clothing, and shaking of the city as it where, we are more attune with the natural energy we work with. So yea Pagans in both faith and magic can pratice naked if they wish. This practice is in no way required or demand.

As a side note:
I hating seeing myself naked.


If you think you are sooooo right about your "religion" why don't you try to convert people?
Pardon me sir or ma'am, have you heard the word of the Goddess lately? Prehaps you would like to par-take in some lovely Wiccan cookies? *2 Lord Cthulhu want’s you to prevent forest fires!

When many of our younger members and a few older ones, begin their walk with the God and Goddess, they find from proper research and conversation, that we do not activity seek out others to convert. It is also true that we discourage and look down up such activities. Sounds crazy huh? The idea of not seeking out is an ideal that many people seem to have trouble understanding. Wouldn't you want to share your faith with the world? Honestly no. While every Pagan truly believes our callen path is the right one… it’s right one, for us.  Each practitioner of the faith, each follower of Bass and Zeus, of Puck and Isis, each one of us where drawn to the faith because of a need for a deeper relationship with the God and Goddess. We felt a kinship with the various Pagan branches, and by our will we sought them out. All because it was right... for us. Having no need to validate ourselves to others, we are content to follow our own hearts.  If our ways, or any ways for the matter, are what the person wants for, they will find it without human (and sometimes petty) intervention.


Of Magic
Honestly I was thinking about not even addressing many of these because magic is a system NOT a religion. But since they come up so often, and because it would have been something nice to have when I was younger...


So you use magic and stuff? Like cast spells and fire balls?!?
"The point of magic is to make the "bendable" world bend to your will... Unless you possess a rock-firm faith in your own powers and in the operability of your spell, you will not achieve the burning intensity of will and imagination which is requisite to make the magic work."
It is true that the Earth based faiths believe in the concept of magic; a force they see as being capable of manipulation through the practice of spells and ritual. Pagans use and work with the forces of nature within sacred circles to bring about real changes in the physical world. Common practices of such spells and rituals include those used for healing, for protection, fertility, or to banish negative influences. Within our book of shadows, one may find many spells of such and other nature. We are taught that one must use magic wisely as things simply to no appear out of no where. If one calls for the rains, one must also be aware that the rains are being taken from somewhere else. However as said as above, we work WITH nature, and can not do anything unnatural. So no flinging fire balls at idiot customers sadly. 

A side note:
I want to make one thing clear again. Magic is a system of using will to bring forth change, it is not a religion system. So while Pagans are open to the idea of magic and it's uses, it is NOT required of the faith to practice magic. In fact many Pagan's couldn't be bothered with magic at all, this is perfectly acceptable.


Do Pagans use crazy death magic then?
Death magic is often assume to be some evil "made for tv" thing and is often misunderstood. But before I go into that, allow me to address what many people think death magic is. When one hears the term "death magic" one assumes one of two things. The first is the practices of necromancy, or the use of magic to raise the dead for purposes most foul. They envision evil witch(s) with legions of zombies at their command, attacking poor defenseless people and cities. Awesome in movies, not so much in reality. Even the Egyptians, who where all about the dead, never used such magic to raise the dead as zombie hordes. The second thing assumed is the same evil witch(s) casting a spell most foul to murder another poor defenseless person. These people play to many video games and are probably mental for entertaining such thoughts. Magic is bound to the rules of nature, we can not bend or break them to suit our petty human needs. Since not even nature can raise the dead as zombie, nor can we. And even if we could,  the rules and acceptable actions are much the same as they where back then.  

Aka we don't do stupid shit.

Now for the other side of the coin. Pagan's of both the present and the past can engage in communication with the dead. Egyptians, Sumerians, and I believe the Celts where big into speaking with the dead. While not required in any fashion, and a major pita to do sometimes, one can still speak with a recently dead assuming said dead person has not passed on to the next life. This can be done for a variety of reasons from the "saying final goodbyes" to asking for advice from honored elders.


How about curses then?
This is another misunderstanding, but the short answer is yes; but not in the way you’re probably thinking. Magic is a force of will that make changes in the physical world. Like the sun in the sky and the water we drink, it is neither good nor evil... it just is. So while it is possible to take such systems (MAGIC IS NOT A RELIGION) and use them for evil, such rubbish is not acceptable in the Pagan communities. Aside from the 3 fold rule and the "do no harm" religious belief, one is also taught to use magic wisely and not for greed. This does not prevent us from using subtle magic to protect ourselves and others. When I speak of curses like this, I’m not talking about making someone head explode (that would be kinda cool I admit); I’m referring to something like “And let this person see not their target, let their hate be infective, let their efforts fail and sour” So In a sense we do use curses, but not in the hellish evil way some people would make you believe.



Can I get a love spell?
Love is a very powerful emotion. It can drive a person to do great heroic deeds that inspire stories for generations to come. It can drive a person to madness and beyond. It can create and stop wars that have or will last for decades, it can redefine and expel social taboos. It can bring us to emotional highs or crumbling falls. Love is a very basic human need, the need to share our lives with another whom we deeply care about. When in love, and not having that love returned, people's mind will sometimes... become illogical and do things that are just stupid. Ex: Love me or some person dies. To this end, many people will do anything for love, even create rocking 80's song. To find this return of unnatural love, a person may use money, power, physical confrontation or sadly even magic. While assisting someone with a "love spell" may seem like a good idea at the time, Oh if only he/she was with me we be happy forever! it is actually a very dangerous endeavor, both mentally and physically. 

In the simplest sense, what you are doing is mind control. Assuming you have the power to do this, the target of the spell has their free will is cast aside and replaced with a love of a person that is not real. By preforming this spell (or having it done for you) you force emotions, attention and attractions upon a person who would not otherwise partake in them.  You are forcing them to take a different road in life and possibly even denying them true love. By this same standard think of yourself as well. Would you really want a love that was fake, would you be able to live with that nagging feeling that this love is forced, fake as the "love" you see on tv, and is not returned freely? Do you really think you could bear that mental burden?


Can you pagan change yourselves into animals?
Physically no. Humanity was created in such a way that the need for a metamorphosis was not needed. We do not enter into magical cocoons and become beautiful butterflies or the wasp man. Being bitten by a bug doesn't grant us super spider powers either. No, you are stuck with the body you are born into. No matter what you do, no matter how many pees and carrots you eat, you are not going to physically turn into an animal ever. However shapefhisting on the spiritual level is a totally different thing. By our will and spirit, we can call upon the visuals of our animal brothers and take on their many aspects. We can let our mind's eye sour to new sighs by the power of the raven's form, we can find new strength and courage by wolf and bear, we can find new life and excitement by otter's playful form.



The Silly Stupid Questions:

Do Pagans have some type of mark on them? Something that says "I was born a witch"?
Despite what some idiots some misinformed people may say, Pagans are people to. We are white and black. We are men and women. We come in sizes from extra small to extra large. We are born as we are, and accepting or changing religions does not changes us physically. This rather rubbish idea begin in the mid 1600's when witch hunters came up with the idea that physical deformities (one of which was a third nipple) where actually "witches marks". These marks where said to be the marking of the dark lord of Mordor the devil to show is dominance over a person, and to show they had dark powers. Kinda like saying "you are mine now" Satan created these mark by raking his claw across flesh, licking (yes you read that right) or by using a hot iron.

So yea, complete bs.


Are Pagan's able to touch the holy bible of the Lord Jesus Christ? Does it hurt to do so?
The bible is said to be a two thousand year old book created after the death of Jesus to canonical his life and teachings. While many people put special stock to it's pages, the bible is still a book like anything else. As such we are able to touch and even read it. In fact I do so on a weekly basis in my battle against the Westboro Baptists cult.

Is it true that witches fly on booms? Can all Pagan's do this?
How amazingly sweet would that be! I wonder how much money could be saved on car insurance and gas alone? Probably enough to feed a small third world nation... On man and think about it! No more car repairs, no more long lines at the airport listen to some bitchy kid, no more traffic jams or vender benders! Regrettably however this is not the case. The Gods did not create us with wings and the winds did not see a need to grant us the gift of flight. Ah well...


Pagans eat babies and do animal sacrifices!

If anyone ever tells you this, and they state it as fact and not jest, backhand the person for being a completely mental tart who spends to much time thinking about eating babies and animal sacrifices.

As a side note:

All life is held a sacred because we believe the Divine exists in all things.


Dear Mr Wiccan dude, do all witches wear point hats and have warts?
Dear random person, no we do not. Being a city witch myself, I can be found in what ever happens to be on sale or found cheap. If I have money to burn, or a present of some kind, I like anything with Cthulhu or Prinnys on it. My "pagan" outfit is based on Celtic garb, which I am actually looking to update. I also bath regularly and am free of noticeable infections on my person. I do have a scar on my chin that proves I am more fragile than glass however. That's a funny story for another time.


Are you like the "ZoMg Oh NoEs! It’s the end of the world, the sky is falling! HOLY MUDKIPS SAVE US!" cults?
 Silly question is silly. As already described, the Pagan faiths are a religion, a belief system; it has never been a cult. We do not have end of the world predictions, cult complexes, nor money or attention seeking prophets rambling on about repenting or "the end is here". Oh and mudkips don’t love you, so deal with it.

Massive orgies? Is this true, sign me up!
Oh bloody hell. People of the pagan faiths like to have sex, just like every other breathing person on the planet. Where do you think kids come from, Sears? Sexual activities are based on the individual, and at the whim of the individual. They are NOT based on some form of religious practice. If a person is having an orgy of some shorts, it because they want to... not because of some lame ass religion excuse.

Are all Pagan raging homosexuals?
Is everyone on the internet a bloody witless git? Are all black people looters and white people lazy? Pagan are people, and this is probably something I can not say enough. Like people, pagans are white, black, red and yellow. They are hereto and homo, they are straight edge and drugies. They are people, and as such have the variety of habits people have. I hope this answers your question.

As a side note:
The pagan faiths to not discriminate based on age, sex or sexual orientation. You are born with the divine inside you, and you are perfect in your own way.


You need to find Jesus, Pagans use the sign of the devil blah blah blah!
The church of Satan, and by extension screwed up people looking for attention, use both the five pointed star AND the holy Christian cross as a mockery. This gits use sacred symbols in perverted forms for both shock value and insult. Since I know for fact Pagans do not worship or follow the Devil despite the use of a pentacle, I will assume the same about Christianity despite them using a cross.


I see you like to talk about Christans a lot. Hater.
More than half of these questions listed here where asked Jesus' followers. It is also no secret that many people claiming to follow Jesus' true teaching think of us (the pagans) as evil and burning in hell. When so called Christan's are the one coming after you most of the time, you tend to see them a lot in the questions they ask. Do the old ways hate Jesus? No, we have problems with the idiots who use religion as an excuse to be an ass.


I hope you enjoyed this first edition of the new Ramblings of a Pagan guy, and hope that you learned something, however small, today.

Until next time, Blessed be.





*1: All source information (and more)  was found http://www.wicca.com/celtic/akasha/holindex.htm because they did a far better write up then I could at 3am in the morning.

*2 Screw you girl scout cookies! Screw you and your deep dark powers of delicious cookie making.